Friday, January 21, 2011


there's a world somewhere that insists on being left to itself. no visitors welcome! if its out-of-the-way location, odd atmospheric disturbances and lack of favorable landing zones don't put you off, we can guarantee that you won't stay long.

before you even land, everything is shutting down, and by the time you get there it's nothing but cold, dark and dreary, nothing to be seen. the lights go out, the trees droop, moving creatures go dormant and hide in burrows, very deep and hard to find. just a bunch of dreary droopy trees and not much else. it starts raining.

most people just leave then. nothing here.

anyone who persists finds it increasingly uncomfortable. bogs appear and get stepped into. stinging plants spring up in all the pathways. wet things drop on your head, sticky and smelly and hard to remove.

anyone still here?

next come the landslides (only where no burrows are, of course) and the rolling moss that bites you. your campsite or prefab hut is built on quicksand and you return to find it sinking fast. was that an earthquake? lightning may flash as you run for your spaceship and you will feel very lucky to get out of there. tell your friends! they won't want to visit.

and all for nothing, a waste of good equipment and time and money. and no useful samples, no valuable minerals, no photo-worthy scenery or quaint native specimens, zero development potential as anything at all! unless you like mud and bad smalls and nasty stinging plants everywhere. yuck!

and off they go very relieved heading for planet resort or planet nervous breakdown recovery treatment center. and the lights go on again, the rain stops, the nettles fade away, the trees straighten up, and finally the animals wake up and come out again.

and the planet goes back to sleep.

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